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The Instant Patch up-Breakup Generation, Are you among them

Parikshit Joshi       |   2014-04-27 23:30:57   |   Relationships   |   Article   |   Posted By: Invade Cafe



I saw her walking through the door and I could feel the wind blowing. She took a step forward and I could breathe her special scent. She smiled as she walked and sun shone in my life. She came and sat besides me on my bed, I felt my heart pounding. Her eyes gave me a steady gaze and I replied the look in a state of complete ecstasy. Some strands of hair disturbed the serene moment, I helped her with her hair. She blushed as I did so, I then childishly placed my head on her lap. I could feel, through my hair her fingers move and she hummed an enchanting but unidentified tune. I looked upon her, she returned the looks. Her chubby cheeks experienced a dimple as she smiled. I was once again like cents of times before enthralled by her pious beauty. She got closer to me...
Suddenly I got up in a shock, only to realize I had slept again thinking of her.
This friend of mine returned before I could read further but I could forecast what was to happen further and it actually happened. There was another girl, his best friend, who had always been his support. He started developing the special feeling for her within days of his breakup. He said in the blind love for his ex, which eventually resulted nowhere, he could never believe in the love she(his best friend) poured on him. He accepted, he had been stupid to heights of stupidity. He never could see the love in simple acts of her supporting him whenever needed. Whenever he used to have a fight with his ex she used to moderate it out and take no credit. He had always searched for love from the wrong place. But this time, he said, would be the right and final one. He could feel the vibes for her. After almost two weeks, he proposed her and she could not say a no. They stepped into a relationship. He found his wounds healing and could fill the cracks of his broken heart with her smile.
Did it last forever, readers might be pondering. I, like the friend of mine, wish it would have but, to everyone's sorrow, it didn't.
It never happens. Only a few really lucky one's find the love of their life at this tender teenage, majority do not. Then it results into the instant breakup-instant patch up cycle.
Teenage is the age of hormonal changes in the body. This is the age when a child gets the feeling of distinction. He/she is no more a child. He/she has grown up now. The child now feels independent enough to take decisions, which influence their life, themselves. They want no one to interfere. This is the age when children, errr... I mean 'teenagers' have secrets they can't share with their parents. Earlier it used to be teachers beating, they leaking in their pants but now the secrets are different. They are serious. Girls generally share with their sisters or mothers, but guys at this age are a worst case scenario. The sense of being a man develops and then they are on their own.
Not those girls are at the comfort zone, but still in a better position than guys. Guys now need someone to share their feelings with. The one they long for. The one they would adore the whole day. The one who will pass burgled smiles during the class! The one who will feel secure with them.
Girls long for a guy they can rely on. When they have cat fights, she can share everything with him. The one who would cross the road holding her hand and suddenly she would feel like the most powerful woman. The one who will support her emotionally and she will feel most secure in his arms.

To these childish fantasies, movies add a spice. Now the feeling is even more intense. No matter of compatibility, no thought about the end result and bang! A relationship starts. She is the cutest girl on earth and he, the most handsome one. She makes him feel complete as she hugs and he generates a sense of security in her. The first lingering kiss, the feeling of not knowing where you are, and then many more of those first kisses. The love she feels when he calls his father “Papa” and the pride he feels when she calls his mother “Mumma”.
If not love, what is all this?

To my view, blind aping! This seldom will last forever. More often it would give wounds, which will require him/her to take the next most foolish step, finding someone else to heal them.
Without knowing, this generation has fallen a trap to this vicious circle. The most energetic phase of most of the teenagers today is lost in the quest to find inconsequential love. After all, it is the belongingness need; Maslow has mentioned it in the Hierarchy of Needs. True! But to the sad point, he also has mentioned that most of the people are stuck in the accomplishments of these needs and forget about the Self-Actualisation needs, the need to get an extraordinary name among the rest.

What happens is that this cycle repeats itself and the teenage grows up with an unnecessary pressure. Things repeat themselves and majority of the teenage-earlier-now-youth fall a customer to senseless activities like drugs, alcohol and smoking. No focus on studies, lack of concentration on jobs. They now turn to become unsuccessful individuals and would hence find more reasons to stick to these activities.
 
This is amongst one of the biggest reason for the great difference between ratio of unsuccessful to successful.

The weaker sections step towards a suicide, as did a cousin of mine few years back and similar did a friend recently.

The latter was saved somehow but the former couldn't survive.
What next? Who suffers? Family, friends, relatives.
They do not understand what they lost was never theirs, but what the family and friends lost was their dearest one.

Shocking but true!
 
The only thing I can suggest as a solution is, “Love yourself, without being selfish.”
If one follows this, I believe the person can turn out to be the happiest. And moreover, if one cannot love oneself how can they love someone who is so distinct and whom do they expect to be loved by. The mentioned solution, it works wonders, only if it does not go unread like many others.




 

 

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Relationships, Break-yp, Ptch-up, Teenagers
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