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Kill me in the womb Mom, I do not want to be born

Shivani Bazaz       |   2014-04-21 04:59:31   |   Women   |   Article   |   Posted By: Invade Cafe

Save me mom; I feel unsafe When I am on my way to school in the playground inside the tuition class while boarding a bus and also when you are not home. I feel scared mom. Do not leave me alone in this cruel world.. I was happy inside the darkness of your womb and I will be more than happy if you kill me before I come out of you.. I wont plead you to let me live in this harsh world I wont say "MAA mujhe jeena hai".

Unfortunately the months of protests and candle light marches went into vain. All our pleas and demands to grant us a safe life in this country went waste and now the I am fed up of this life. Why live in a place where I feel unsafe every second of my life. No laws can protect me no police can safeguard me because I demons all around me who either by their stares or their words r their monstrous activities shatter my individuality and modesty.

After Nirbhaya there is another small girl who has been pushed to live a life where she will die every moment missing her happiness and modesty. Everyone will still blame me of boarding a bus with strangers as they did to Nirbhaya. Why because it is my fault to board a bus when I was tired. The society will blame me of things that happened  to me because I have been sent from above to take blame and prove myself as the idol of sacrifice and mercy.

Today I am aghast and ashamed I am sorry and I want to apologize for my mistakes; A mistake of not wearing proper clothes of living my life as I want to of dreaming and visualizing a happy life of being independent of going to movies of making friends of going out at night of not thinking that i am inferior to men of forgetting that the world is full of monsters and of taking birth as a girl in this patriarch society. I am sorry I apologize.

Better was the time of girl child killings I didnt knew that after I force the society to give me a right to live the society will give me a life of shattered pride and molested individuality. I am sorry mom today I can understand the meaning of your tears that you shed on my birth. You knew what this society will give me and we blamed you of losing motherhood in greed of a boy. No you were right I shouldnt have been born in this world.
Do not give me birth if you love me mom i do not want to be born - Kill me inside your womb the pain will be a relief for me.

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